Root, Root Root For The Away Team…(Funny blog from Comedy Central’s and NBC’s Dwayne Perkins)

I recently went to see my beloved Yankees play the Dodgers in Dodger Stadium. I like the Dodgers but I love the Yankees. The Dodgers pulled a fast one and only offered the Yankee tickets as a part of a package. To see the one game I really cared about I had to buy tickets to 14 games. I only felt slightly manipulated as I love going to baseball games.

So, wanting to see the Yankees precipitated buying tickets to 14 games which precipitated buying bleacher tickets which precipitated me fearing for my life when I wore my Yankees hat to said bleachers. The egotistic, nonsensical New Yorker in me thought that Dodger Stadium would be completely overtaken by Yankee fans. Like it would basically be a Yankee home game that just happened to be taking place 3,000 miles away from New York. Maybe the 1st baseline was overrun with Yankee Blue but the bleachers offered no safe haven for Yankee faithfuls. There was just enough Yankee fans in the bleachers to make noise, band together and get completely drowned out by the bleacher Dodger rowdies. Sometimes having a small contingent is worse than having none at all. With no one to help you have no options but a small contingent may give you just enough confidence to engage in an un-winnable war. Did I just channel Sun Tsu?

LA fans are notoriously docile. I’ve out cheered my whole section at Laker games. Even other parts of Dodger Stadium are littered with hummus eating fans who arrive in the 3rd inning and leave after the 7th. The bleachers can be equally disengaged with the game but they replace game watching with booing, threats and occasional violence. For 9 innings straight, every Yankee fan that stood up or clapped was met with a chorus of boos and profanities.

So the Dodger fans gave us crap the whole game. What could we do but jar back? We’re New Yorkers after all. As Mariano Rivera came in to save the game for the Yankees. I started to think a Yankee win may be be a Dwayne loss. I escaped unscathed but I may have to spring for better tickets next year. I’m a man of the people but maybe I can’t sit with them at baseball games.

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