No Librarians Please (Funny blog from Comedy Central’s and NBC’s Dwayne Perkins)

If you’re like me, you have certain professions that you just get along with and others that you clash with. It’s implausible that it could hold true across the board but, with rare exceptions, I don’t get along with librarians. We suffer each other but it’s always tense. Even our 30 second interactions seem to have 30 minutes of suspense. Like we’re on thin ice and even the graze of a pebble will make the whole thing cave in. It might be my natural inclination to challenge rules vs. their natural inclination to blindly enforce them.

Book storage takes order but then again the books don’t have legs. To be fair to Librarians, I actually have no problem with Librarians. What?! Yes, see the people at the reference desk of a Library who help you find books and deftly explain the Dewey Decimal system 60 times a day are actually “Librarians”. They’re usually helpful and friendly. Whereas the people who check out your books are not technically Librarians. The clerk’s ‘tudes may come from being called Librarians all day but knowing deep inside that they in fact are not. But I’m not bitter. So actually, I don’t get along with Library worker people.

I get along with Flight attendants quite swimmingly. It would take a long scroll to list the preferential treatment I’ve gotten from Flight Attendants. From being bumped up, to free bags of Tazo tea to once even being consoled because I looked sad, flight attendants dig me. They don’t “mile high club” dig me but I’m happy for the extra drinks and free snack boxes.

I have a good history with drivers of limos and car services but my relationship with Taxi cab drivers is touch and go. Baristas are ambivalent toward me, even though I usually tip a whole dollar on a 2 dollar tea. I actually have a half way decent relationship with cops. (that admission stays here)

I get along with comedians, obviously. But I like musicians more.  I wonder if we could generate a new dating site based not on how you describe yourself but what professions you get along with.

Oh you like Crane Operators and Bakers too? It’s Kismet I tell ya.

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